Daylight Savings

I can't wake up, daylight savings came three weeks early this year. I guess a groundhog ran into a leprechaun and decided to move the date up. But I can't get onto the new schedule. I'm all out of wack. So I go looking for someone to blame of course. Turns out this is all congressman Markey's fault (D-MA).

So here is an actual quote off of MSNBC:

"In addition to the benefits of energy saving, less crime, fewer traffic fatalities, more recreation time and increased economic activity, daylight saving just brings a smile to everybody's faces," Congressman Markey said in a press statement.

Am I the reading that right? One of the reasons to change the time was to "bring a smile to everybody's face"! What kind of crock is that! I mean is Markey some kind of mutant morning person? Who here honestly says, oh! boy we get to loose an hour of sleep only to undo it in 6 months!

I'm more worried about arbitrarily moving the date up 3 weeks. Ben Franklin invented daylight savings and he had reasons for choosing the dates. And one of them was NOT smiles. If we move it up three weeks every year soon we'll be going to work in the dead of night and sleeping during the day. But we'll be doing it with BIG SMILES ON OUR FACES... I guess.

If the government is so concerned about smiles, here are some other suggested amendment:

• Every traffic ticket now comes with a caramel.
• Make the yellow light on traffic signals a Smiley Face.
• Publicly beat Markey.
• The DMV will now offer an extra line for those who are "like seriously in a hurry" so you don't have to wait in that other long line.
• Tax breaks for dance lessons.
• Instead of Camo the Army Soldiers can now wear colorful and entertain scrubs like pediatric nurses: This years hot fashion in Kabul is Winnie the Pooh scrubs.
• Pediatric nurses will be allowed to carry firearms.
• Police siren to be replaced by Ice-Cream Man song "The Entertainer"... "Oooh Ice Cream, wait... no, I'm being pulled over... at least I get a caramel."

I'll bet your smiling already!