DACLT,MH: The Two Lists
On this episode of "Dogs and cat's living together, mass hysteria" I provide two lists.
I can see now it is impossible to fight the hook up, so I might as well facilitate it to my own ends. So if you want to hook me use one of these two lists
Now to the lists.
When you sit down to think about your "dream person" you end up making a list of attributes and character traits. This ideal person does not exist anywhere in the world. But here is my list, neither list is really in any order:
- Good sense of humor
- Committed Member of the Church of Christ
- Attractive
- Wants children
- Lots of energy
- Like things, has opinions - I hate people who say "Whatever" to everything.
- Smart - Not an Einstein but still smart
- Reads books - Magazine readers not needed
- Nice
- Someone who is good at the things I'm not good at: thank you notes, birthdays, junk drawer purging, etc - in short a suitable helper
- Easy going
- Likes me
Now the second list. While making that first list I started thinking about the a list of characteristics shared by my actual ex-girlfriends. You may notice some differences
- Good sense of humor but doesn't know it
- Very Attractive (I didn't know it until I looked back at my dating record how shallow I am)
- Member of some Christian faith (including a couple Baptists, and one 7th Day Adventurist and one Catholic)
- Wants either no kids or seventeen.
- "Aggressive"... wink wink... if you catch my meaning
- Smart but doesn't believe it
- Reads only when forced.
- Sarcastic
- Possessive
- Jealous
- OCD
- Likes the "idea" of being with me
So good luck people,
Trey
New Item: Full Time Minister. Being a children's minister either scares off girls or attracts a strange following. Nobody wants to be married to Ned Flanders, but trust me I'm closer to Homer. Of course there are some Flanders Followers, they are usually disappointed in me.
posted by Trey Laminack @ 10:00 AM
6 comments
6 Comments:
i'm confused, are you saying the second list is of things you DON'T want? or just things that on second thought were like your other girlfriends and you are okay with?
That second list is characteristics of actual girlfriends. It is there to provide contrast between ideals and reality.
No, Trey. It's Seventh Day ACTIVIST. Duh.
See though I think people trying to hook you up works so much better for guys. I actually think its flattering when people want to hook me up but nothing ever really comes from it. It usually goes like this- they say "hey you should date so and so." However, I guess I'm old fashioned because I'm not going to do the asking--so then its just left at that because the hooker uppper doesn't usually follow through to actually share their brilliant plan with the guy. But if someone tells a guy that you should date so and so then you can actually do something about it if you choose.
Now that I'm writing this though maybe the hooker upper actually does tell the guy and then he just isn't interested in me so maybe never mind...
Is there some secret girl at Saturn Road that you're actually writing this to? You sure have been talking about the hook up a bunch recently. Are you trying to get someone interested in you without saying it? Well, Trey good luck with the hook ups. Dude, enjoy it while you can. At least date the attractive granddaughters and nieces that are thrown at you. I'm getting so bored, I almost wish that people were trying to hook me up!
Where's Virginia Walton when you need her Lindsey?
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